Safety Tips to Bear in Mind

Perhaps you have considered using online dating services, but not yet tried them. You’re curious, but hesitant. You may be thinking, “I'd like to meet someone new, but how do I avoid weirdos and stalkers?"

Yet most people using online dating services are looking for the same thing you are: friendship, maybe romance.  Most of them are nice, decent people.  Many are busy professionals whose work makes it difficult for them to meet potential partners in more conventional ways. 

It is reasonable to be concerned about safety, but keep it in perspective. Just use some common sense and follow your intuition... plus a few safety rules.

First Steps:

It is not difficult to find out a lot about someone from just a phone number or a last name and first initial. So be cautious about giving these out, inadvertently or otherwise.

If your business/personal e-mail includes your name, get a separate account specifically for use with personals. When signing up, use a code name - have fun making up something original.

Once you’ve chosen a dating service, create a profile or identity to let people know about you and what type of person and/or relationship you seek. Again, take precautions to ensure your safety and privacy.    Only ever use your code name.  Give the broad area of where you live, but don't be too specific.

Initial Meetings Online:

Once you have a profile, it is time to start meeting new people. You can chat online and exchange e-mail, being cautious about giving out too much personal data.  Make sure you know someone well - that you have talked to him or her long enough, and enough times, to feel it is safe - before you give out any such information. Use your gut instinct but err on the side of caution.  Remember - you control how much someone knows about you.

Online To ‘Phone Line:

Once you know someone and are interested in knowing them better, you will want to move to speaking on the phone.   But should you be giving out your number?  You may want to ask the other person to give you his/her number, rather than giving out your own. "Ahh!...," you say, "What about Caller ID?"   Check with your phone service for ways to deal with this.  With BT, for instance, you simply dial 141 before their number and your own will be withheld if they enquire

Meeting Face To Face:

When deciding to meet in person, again be cautious.  Choose a public place, such as a busy restaurant or coffee shop.  A daytime date is preferable the first time. Have your own means of transport so that if you feel uncomfortable you can leave.  Discuss, beforehand, whether or not you plan to go Dutch - but have some extra cash on hand, just in case.

Enjoy Yourself

Take action to minimise risks, but don’t be scared off by the need for caution. Use common sense but do what feels right for you.  Most importantly, have fun.  Meeting people online should be interesting and enjoyable, and most people you will meet are friendly and harmless. So go ahead. Who knows, you may be one of the lucky ones to find true love in cyberspace!